WoW. Wow? Not so much. I realize that I’m in the minority, the tiny minority of gamers who are not impressed with World of Warcraft.

I’ll admit I have a low threshold for repetition; as any devoted WoW-er knows, in order to get to the point where you can team up with parties and go questing you need to level up your character Which means you have to grind, grind, grind, killing hundreds upon hundreds of monsters for untold hours to raise your experience level to the point where you’d be a useful party member.

Did you enjoy that run-on sentence? If I were to write this entire blog entry in one sentence with no punctuation you would have already stopped reading. That’s a good allegory for my experience with WoW. Grinding is so dull that people had to create scripts to make their characters grind automatically with no supervision. That’s fun?

There must be a particular mindset prevalent in die-hard WoW players. Party questing is what most people stick around for, and I didn’t last long enough to qualify for group outings, so I can’t comment on that aspect. Probably if I’d persevered through all the grinding I may have had a lot more fun with WoW.

Maybe not, though. What’s up with the graphics in World of Warcraft? The design of the game was barely passable when it first came out; you’d think that several years later they would have revamped the thing. But no, it’s still the blocky, neon-hued, often poorly-mapped environments, and characters that look like they have a polygon count as low as the Marines in Quake 2. (Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh. Quake 3? You know what I mean.) Granted, it’s a fantasy game and it’s not meant to look realistic. But really. (By the way, whatever happened with NURBS? Weren’t we due for an improvement over polygons some time ago? I’m really sick of seeing hexagonal wheels.)

Right around when WoW hit the peak of its popularity we started seeing a whole bunch of free-to-play MMORPGs, most from Asia - with graphics that aped those of WoW. In fact, aside from their decidedly Asian-influenced design, they were practically WoW clones, offering the same kind of grind-and-level gameplay. Given the success of WoW, many of these games garnered immense interest and made prett good money via microtransactions (the sale of in-game items like clothing and weapons).

Now that MMORPGs are huge business, we expect more. There’s really no reason anymore for crappy graphics. The first evidence I’ve seen of a true leap forward in design is Lord of the Rings Online. Right now I’m previewing the new expansion, Mines of Moria, and let me tell you, it’s a world away from the WoW generation.

Next up: More on Mines of Moria.

The first multiplayer online role-playing game I ever played was Ultima Online - meaning, paid for a subscription and invested innumerable hours in developing a character. It was a natural move for me; Ultima VI was my introduction into the world of single-player RPGs, and the game fascinated me to no end. The world of Britannia was teeming with citizens, each of whom had his or her own schedule. Merchants would wake up and open their shops at a particular time, then close down and go home. Citizens roamed the streets, often talking to other citizens. Everyone had an agenda, a timetable. I was thrilled to be a part of this already living world - the possibilities seemed endless.

Graphics back then were still pretty crude: EGA was the norm, or basic 16-color VGA if you were lucky enough to have a 16-bit machine like mine: a 386SX/16 with 4mb RAM and a 40mb hard drive - plenty of room to house the game data. Inside the big game box stuffed with manuals and a big cloth map were no less than 12 - count ‘em, 12 - installation disks. The actual floppy ones of yore - huge, bendy floppy disks. I’ll never forget the time I lost installation disk 10 … nevermind.

Years later when I heard that Origin was putting out an online version of Ultima, the slobbering began immediately. I somehow wrested myself into the Beta and behold, there was Ultima in all its 2D isometric, sprite-filled glory. The graphics were a slightly improved version of those in Ultima VII (the last decent SP Ultima title) and the game world seemed huge. And crowded - often there were so many players on screen you couldn’t find your own avatar. I played for several months along with my girlfriend at the time who, mercifully, was also a gamer. Questing with her was a blast.

As with most games, I eventually tired of playing UO and cancelled my subscription (my gf kept playing for a couple of years!). But UO had catalyzed a watershed, and soon we saw games like EverQuest (EverCrack as my buddies called it) and Asheron’s Call take over the online-gaming playing field. I tried both of those and became almost instantly bored. Nevertheless, a new cash cow had been born. I doubt anyone involved had any idea just how enormous the genre would become.

Online gaming took a back seat for me - it was in the trunk, actually - for a number of years. (Writing for CNET left precious little time for frivolous gaming.) Then, out of nowhere, came World of Warcraft. From the Diablo people. Diablo? That isometric dungeon crawler? What the hell could this online thing be?

At the very least, it was the birth of a new acronym: MMORPG.

Next up: WoW, the free-to-play explosion, and Lord of the Rings Online.

Midway is releasing some of their older games, the full versions, as free downloads. They’re ad-supported, of course, but from what I’ve seen the ads are relatively unobtrusive.

But behind this magnamimosity, I fear, is something far more sinister.

For example, Area 51 - a 2005 game that, surprisingly, holds up extremely well for its age. The graphics are quite acceptable and tha gameplay is a bit like that of F.E.A.R., with strange, alien things going on and squad-based combat.

Aside from all that, Midway may be trying to slip us a clue with the ad they’ve “chosen” to support the game: a video advertisement from the U.S. Air Force of a rocket launching into space. The POV of the video suggests that you are affixed to the side of the ship, and you get to witness a booster section of the rocket jettisoned toward the earth.

Area 51, the supposed top secret airbase connected to the Roswell incident and more, seems like the last sort of video game that the USAF would legitimize by buying an ad. Conspiracy?

With this in mind, I visited PlayWhat’s authority of choice on the UFO phenomenon: AlienZoo, an indispensable resource for information on all things Alien. AlienZoo’s mantra is “Don’t feed the conspiracy”, so I feel a bit sheepish about concocting yet another wild-eyed theory. But here goes.

AlienZoo has a resident Gray, Gunther, who blogs about conspiracies in order to set humans straight, debunking that which must be debunked. I can’t tell you whether this is a real Gray, and if he is, whether he resides on our planet or simply channels his information to the AlienZoo staff. But given my suspicions, I’m not about to dismiss his existence. We’re being surreptitiously prepared for something.

In a recent blog entry - Humans film UFOs over Turkey - Gunther sheds light on recent UFO sightings in Turkey, caught on video. It’s pretty spooky stuff. In one of videos you can see a closeup of a - wait for it - cigar-shaped craft, clearly metallic in appearance, hovering in the distance, at one point directly below the moon. The videographers seem to catch it from several different angles.

In one of these angles, the craft takes on the appearance of a very familiar ship: the Jupiter 2 from the original Lost in Space series. Look at this pic and tell me you don’t see a creepy resemblance:

Maybe (well, certainly) I think too much, but go with me. For decades, extra-terrestrial beings may have been exerting a mild form of mind control over creative people, in particular filmmakers and game designers, to influence the designs of alien spacecraft and alien “monsters” preparing us for, perhaps, a devastating alien invasion to come - in the hopes that we will find a way to stand up for ourselves and defeat them.

In this scenario, I see the Grays as benevolent beings, and why not? Certainly if they had wanted to conquer us they would do a lot more than hover in their ships just far enough away that we can’t see them clearly. Right? Plus, we have Gunther. I’m sure he’d warn us if evil, STS creatures like the Lizzies were anywhere near our planet.

So, back to Area 51. Is it some kind of virtual training module a la America’s Army (or even The Last Starfighter? Chew on that for a minute). In any case, it’s free. It’s the entire game. And despite its obviously linear design, it’s definitely fun to play. I’d suggest that you play it - better safe than sorry.

I guess I fed the conspiracy. Sorry, Gunther.

Although Spore received generally favorable reviews, the game still gets a bad rap in some quadrants (and by “quadrants” I mean “forums”). Players complain that gameplay is too simplistic, nowhere near the “evolution simulator” they expected thanks to the game’s incredible Hype Machine.

Another complaint is that it’s an amalgamation of several existing games - “lite” versions of titles like Flow and Civilization - an almost outright theft of ideas.

Well, Spore is not an evolution simulator, not by a long shot, but it really shouldn’t be judged by that standard. Spore is a whimsical sandbox, an elegantly-designed “build-it-and-see-what-happens” simulator.

And instead of theft, I prefer to think of the Spore’s similarities to other games as “inspired by” rather than stealing, since Spore’s versions are considerably watered-down - in context, though, still fun.

The first time I played through the game I moved quickly, anxious to see what fun things would come next. The result was that I finished the first three sections - amoeba through civilization - in a very short time, failing to enjoy the surprises that did occur by always anticipating the next.

If you want to get maximum enjoyment out of Spore, do not play this way. The true glory of Spore is in the details.

By far, the game’s strong point is its construction module. If you’ve tried the Spore Creature Creator you have a good idea of the strength of this contraption. It offers a slick, drag-and-drop design method that’s complex while still being fun. You can build any kind of malformed creature you want and then make it try to jump and ambulate around. It’s a great playground for wicked sadists like me.

But the creature builder is only the beginning. As you progress through the game you use the same drag-and-drop approach in creating buildings, cities, vehicles and finally, space ships. You could spend days building all sorts of exquisitely detailed objects and not even bother with the “game”.

As a true dork, I of course had no choice but to build a Federation starship for my first venture into space. You may bask in its glory:

Don’t get all bent out of shape, it’s not the Enterprise. It’s the U.S.S. Crustacea, so named due to its two crab-pincher-ish extra warp nacelles (experimental, ssh).

If you can work your way out of the creator, there’s a lot more detail to enjoy. Once you reach the Tribal stage, make it a point to zoom in close to the action regularly - there’s a lot of humorous stuff going on. In particular, the indigenous, non-sentient creatures on each planet are worth examining for their often bizarre design and behavior. It’s a hoot to fly in close with your space ship and scare the crap out of them - make sure to pick up a few and sling them across the surface of the planet. It’s also fun to abduct a species from one planet, place them on a less-hospitable planet and watch them perish in anguish.

Of all the sections, the Space Age is most interesting to me; the preceding parts seem paltry in comparison. In the Space Age you get access to a fairly expansive universe filled with a slew of different species to meet. Some races are cool and want to set up alliances and trade routes with you; others are just plain douchebags who want to kill you for no reason. I hate those guys.

I’ve been spending way too much time negotiating the Space Age. It’s one of those things where once you start playing you get hooked and end up telling yourself, “Okay, just two more missions, then I’ll stop” until 2 in the morning. It’s bad enough that a single galaxy offers so many things to do; once you hit the Space Age for the first time you can start up new Space Age galaxies with brand new species and civilizations. And the aliens are randomized each time, so it takes quite a while for the feeling of repetition to set in.

In defense of the complainers, I will say that I’m anxious to see what Spore 2 will bring. Like them I was sort of hoping that the creature-evolving part of Spore would be a little more complex, more like natural selection, with algorithms that would actively “evolve” a creature based on decisions you’d made - rather than the player having complete control. What we got this time was a sandbox. But according to Mr. Wright there are plenty of changes and add-ons in Spore’s future, so you never know.

My stance toward violence in games is one of frustration and disappointment. It’s clear to me that, aside from the huge male demographic that craves blood and explosions, there are two main things preventing video games from growing up and out of Destruction and Gore Mode: Graphics and Interface.

Game graphics are moving along more quickly. We’re not far - I hope - from photorealistic virtual humans who move and behave convincingly enough to obliterate the Uncanny Valley. Nowadays, all computer generated humans look artificial and stiff. I’m sorry, but even that trailer for Heavy Rain that features the much-ballyhooed “ultra-realistic” girl - that’s unrealistic, too, a perfect example of Uncanny Valley syndrome. If you can’t talk to ‘em, might as well murder ‘em, right?

As for the second roadblock, the human-computer interfaces available at this point in history are crude, to say the least. In terns of immersion, mouse-and-keyboard control is a joke. And console game controllers - yes, even the Wii remote - are basic gadgets that reward you for manual dexterity at the cost of constant awareness that you’re pounding buttons on a hand-held thingamajig in front of a TV screen.

Obviously we have a long way to go (much to the delight of basement dwellers worldwide). Luckily, there is some progress being made on the interface/immersion front. Emotiv Systems is offering a snazzy piece of headgear called “emotivEPOC”, a brain-powered controller; and NAU is proffering “Immersive Cocoon”, which is … well, read on.

I first came across Emotiv’s device at E for All 2007, where they were demonstrating the functionality of their strange new device, by letting folks don the headgear and try it out.

The unit incorporates sensors that supposedly pick up changes in the brain’s electrical activity and translate them to computer input. At the time it could sense only general brainwave states (I don’t pretend to understand the science of it), which change depending on how intensely you “concentrate”. The resulting effect in a computer simulation was a little man raising or lowering his arms. I came away from that demo unimpressed.

It appears that Emotiv has improved the device considerably since then, now featuring 14 sensors, a gyroscope and a form of facial expression recognition.

The idea of controlling a computer with your thoughts is fascinating, and one wonders what sorts of activities such an interface could inspire. As cool as it is, though, one thing it ain’t is immersive - yet. But as we’ve seen in movies like eXistenZ and Strange Days, such a device is bound to develop into a two-way communication system that can “write” as well as “read” - i.e. feed a completely immersive virtual environment into your brain while reading your reactions and actions within it. I only hope to see that in my lifetime.

If you’ve seen Minority Report you were probably awed by the neato gesture-controlled interface used to great effect by Mr. Cruise. You thought some brilliant futurist came up with that? Actually, it was based on the Immersive Cocoon:

What the hell is an Immersive Cocoon, you say? It’s a big round chamber in which the entire inside wall displays a virtual environment. It tracks your movements with motion-capture cameras, letting “your entire body become the interface.” It even has a motion-sensitive floor plate. I don’t know about you, but I think this is some dang cool stuff. I wouldn’t mind working on a spreadsheet in there, or better yet, playing Halo:

Seems to me that for the foreseeable future, this Cocoon - or something like it - will be our best bet for gaming immersion. It’s the best thing I’ve seen so far. Trouble is, most gamers probably won’t be able to afford to buy it. It will definitely spring up in public places though, and you’ll be able to schedule sessions in advance. Let’s just hope the things don’t start showing up in porn shops and strip clubs. Wait, what? Do I really mean that?

At least things are starting to look at least somewhat promising. If you want to decide whether this is something you want to start saving pennies for, get the full skinny on the Immersive Cocoon website. Here’s an interesting diagram - just imagine yourself lounging on that super-cool couch:

Waaaaaaay back in the 90s - before some of you were born - I got my hands on a pair of nifty stereoscopic glasses. This gizmo came with special software that was able to take the image from any 3D game and split it in two (based on the Z-buffer, I believe) and synchronize them to the polarized lenses in the glasses. This was some amazing stuff for the time. It worked better on some games than on others, and the effect wasn’t exactly true 3D, but it still blew me away.

Of course, this was the 90s, so an annoying cable ran from the glasses to a specialized VESA (!!) card on the back of the computer. I wish I could remember the name of the dang thing. I found this list of various 3D goggle contraptions circa 2000; sadly, my device isn’t listed there, although it’s in the same general ballpark.

(The roster of 3D-glasses-compatible games available at the time - what a memory rush. Descent, Magic Carpet, Duke Nukem 3D, even Hi-Octane, an obscure sci-fi racing game that I’d never have remembered otherwise. I used my 3D glasses with all of them. Profusely.)

Wait, I remember now! It’s the Elsa 3D Revelator! Remember Elsa?? Man, those were the days. Those glasses still look pretty keen almost a decade later.

What made me think of all this is a recent bit-tech.net article about Nvidia’s new GeForce Stereoscopic 3D technology, which works on the same principle used by the Revelator except the lenses are LCD rather than polarized. Below are pics of the Revelator and the Nvidia Geforce thing (thanks, bit-tech).

Can you guess which is which? Spoiler below.

Although it looks like a cord is attached to both, I’m sorry to tell you that the pair on the right is Nvidia’s new (wireless) thang. Hard to believe, eh?

Speaking of hard to believe, I’ll admit I’m a little confused as to what’s going on here. I’m sure you know that actual 3D monitors have been around for a few years now. These things provide 3D visuals without glasses. Now, I don’t know about you, but I’d rather not wear some clunky glasses if I don’t have to. True, with these monitors you have to stay within a certain, somewhat limited viewing angle to enjoy the full 3D effect, but the alternative is worse. Isn’t it? Nvidia even makes drivers for 3D monitors that work with most games.

So, can someone tell me, why more glasses? The only possible explanation I can come up with is price point. Obviously I’m a wee bit tired of the glasses phenomenon. Even with the new-fangled 3D movies that are coming out now require you to don an uncomfortable plastic visor thing to make the 3D effect work. How much better is this, really, than those silly old red and blue things? But, I digress. I’ll tackle that next time.

Sorry for the Wii/We pun in the title. I’m as sick of that crap as you are. But it’s irresistible.

As you’ll see in the video below, Wii MotionPlus looks extremely cool. While Microsoft will most likely need to build a whole new controller in order to do motion sensing stuff (rumor, of course), Nintendo just cranks out a little pluggy thing that snaps right onto the base of the existing WiiMote and voila, realistic light saber and ball-throwing control. Sweet. Question is, why now? You’d think it would have been easier to integrate those functions into the existing Wii controller before shipping the console. Rush to market much?

No matter, wii (!!) welcome it, this purveyor of great new gaming capabilities to come. O, let it be priced under $30.

As promised, here are last three vids of E3-tastic games.

Mirror’s Edge (PC, 360, PS3): This title was a surprise to me - I’d never even heard of it, then when I watched the video walkthrough I became an instant fan. Imagine what it might be like to be a UPS dude with no truck, delivering super important packages one by one while people are trying to kill you, and your primary routes involve leaping across the rooftops. In first-person POV. It looks fascinating. To get the full picture you need to see the developer walkthrough video.

I wasn’t lucky enough to be among the Press who attended E3 2008. But I’m still overwhelmed by the number of great games scheduled for release this year - thanks to Gamespot’s stellar coverage of the event. (Ah, to have such resources for a gaming site.)

There’s a whole bushel of games I can’t wait to get my hands on. I’m too lazy to list them all, but I thought it would be cool to post some E3 preview videos of a few of them, mainly for my own convenience. Oh, and you might enjoy them, too.

In no particular order:

Animal Crossing: City Folk (Wii): Yeah, I play Animal Crossing on DS - wanna make something of it? If you aren’t familiar with the series, it’s sort of like a “trainer” RPG, ostensibly aimed at kids but there’s something weirdly fascinating about it nonetheless. Without going into too much detail, some of the new features include the ability to exchange email with friends in the real world, and the integration of the WiiSpeak feature. What did you say? You wanna step outside?

He picks up a solid, spherical object about the size of his hand; meticulous stitching traces its contour in wavy arcs. Its weight is not too much, not too little, but it is certainly dense enough to cause damage were it used as a projectile weapon. His left hand is encased in what looks like a glove but exaggeratedly oversized, far too large to be of use in any endeavor requiring nimble fingers.

However, the rugged sphere fits nicely in the palm of the glove, and he plays at tossing and catching the little white globe repeatedly. Then at once he stopps, ball in glove, and takes upon his visage a somber tone of intense concentration. Without breaking his piercing forward stare he rears back and then swings his arm forward with great force, launching the little stitched object with such force that it scarcely could be seen.

He stumbles forward a bit then regains his composure, now alert to his surroundings. A loud CRACK pierces the air. His eyes train skyward, following an unseen thing as it sails above him. Seeing it reach its target, he hops a bit in place and seems to be beckoning attention. Suddenly he shoots into motion, extending his gloved hand high above his head, and with a loud WHACK the sphere appears wihin the glove.

It doesn’t stay long - he immediately jettisons the thing to his left, watching it go excitedly. Another fainter WHACK, followed by the scraping of dried soil.

Almost instantaneously he balls his hand into a fist and punches violently at the air, bellowing “Yeah! Woo!” again and again until, eventually, the ball falls in a gentle arc, landing safely in the too-large glove.

He follows this pattern repeatedly as the evening wears on, always the same, for hours and hours.

And this is a sport.

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The room is pitch dark save for a pulsing glow illuminating the face of a young man staring intently ahead. Tongue wedged in the corner of his mouth, he holds with both hands a device of considerable mass and curving construction, sprouting what could be two small mushrooms and small, evenly-spaced, multi-colored protuberances.

His treatment of this device is poor and reckless, to say the least. He clutches it with immense force, and with his thumbs hammers away at its rainbow bumps. Sweat breaks on his brow, he grunts and grimaces.

The device bound to his head consists of a padded earpiece that conceals one ear while a thin rod with a bulbous tip extends around the front of his face, resting at the mouth. He seems not to mind the rather severe-looking head binding and in fact seems not to notice the contraption at all.

Strangest of all is the spate of similar young men lined up at several long tables, each parked in the same manner, with the same glow on their faces, the same frenzied finger mashing, the same brow sweat.

The din in the place is deafening. Crashing and smashing, cries of pain all come together in one visceral audio affront. And all of this continues for hour upon hour.

And this, too, is a sport.

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I’d rather not consider gaming a sport, but it’s random and repetitive - like all sports - so why not?

And though right now the “sport” of gaming is limited to hunting and killing other people, at least it bodes well for a future of intellectual sporting. Or something like that. I keep thinking of that ancient civilization that played sport in which a human head was used for a ball. Why can’t we bring that back?